tonight was beautiful to me. the tastes, the smell, the music, the teeny tiny moment that stood still so I could hug it. summer can have that affect. when its not choking you wiht the heat it can have the perfect mix of goodness in the late evening with the cicadas screaming, the tomatoes plump, the peaches sweet, the wine crisp, and the sweaty kid smiling just for extra time awake with us.

how do i even begin to catch up... i shouldn't try, but only to say the summer continued very much in the same vein as my last post. i was in the throws for most days of beating down oversized expectations and finding all the silver linings... that have been there all along but didn't get my attention. so all days didn't look perfect but i was aware of this new sense, this new place God was continually asking me to be in of gratitude and desire. because of that i have sat with Hannah more, watched and kissed her more, I have entered in again at work, turning the page and rewriting more of that potential, i have tried on grace with my husband more often and known the days to let things be, and i have hoped big in friendship and also found more contentendess in the little things between friends. not all perfectly and all the time but all more consciously.

i have also taken better care of myself, trying to be more generous to new hairs on my face or inches on my thighs and really really enjoyed my strength in excercise and the space that is alloted for just me in excercise. I have run all summer long and loved it. i love the time alone, i love the music, i love the inches on my thighs that are getting stronger. and we have starting taking my chrohn's more seriously again and we have been following mostly paleo diet and eating beautiful fresh meals. im about to pass out for my desire for baked goods but i love feeling like i am actively caring for my body and doing good by it by eating no processed foods and as much local fresh food as possible. i feel good. Stephen helps a lot.

i want to write again if anyone on earth is still trying to keep up but i am realistic too now that trying to shove 40 hours of work into 4 days makes my desire to sit in front of the computer outside of that really low. and my brainwidth and heartwidth aren't always there but it's therapuetic when i can and i want to remember our life.

so happy end of summer, here are a VERY few pics of what we've been up to.