I am 100 mothers. When I think today about the mothers I celebrate, the mother I have and the mother I am, I realize that what I have the privilege to be is the result of about 100 mothers around me and before me. Pieces of what I have seen in my lifetime shape so much of the mother than I hope to be.

Early mother memories are most significantly of course of my own mother - the best comfort around - you almost wanted a sick day so that you could see the fullest expression of TLC on this planet. (i still have a ways to go in this category btw). Then I have memories of Ginger and Sandra, Mallory and Romy's mom. First of all, they were both very chic and cool. Secondly, at Mallory's we had the best snacks with the coolest utensils (like the cheese cutter) and I have so many memories of Ginger's laugh. At Romy's, Ms. Simpson she was so "chill" with the long wavy clothes, cool haircuts, and we perfected Super Mario Brothers on the Ninetindo there. These mothers made significant impressions on my childhood.

Time goes on and there are a myriad of mother's faces and voices I can remember. Some communicating joy and encouragement. Some wrapped tight in fear with articulate list of boundaries and rules. I am so both. In high school, so many of the mom's I remember very clearly were boy's mothers, I loved a few of them, they were so nice to me and seemed SO laid back. And of course I remember the mother who told me that when we start our "flow" we may find ourselves craving beer more than usual and I have tried to stick by that rule too. I remember Aunts that were like mothers that displayed the art of asking "what's going on in your heart honey?" I have some amazing Aunts who I vividly remember giving me the feeling I could tell them the whole truth too and they wanted to know me.

The last decade or so new mother's faces appeared, in fact in most cases it felt everyone was a mother before me, and I was watching my friends so closely. OH, they are beautiful mothers. Now I see the advantage of my years to watch them. I remember calling SO many of them to figure out sleep training, food, kid's dressing themselves, and on and on. These years had me calling on my sister-in-law Anna, on Sandy, Randy, and Kim - tearfully begging for the secret tricks. "Clothes are one of the few ways they can express themselves", and "set the timer and if you feel sick and worried way before, find your limit of time", and "start real foods when you are ready to feed all day long don't let the book tell you when". I will never forget one series of phone calls with these women and they literally gave me ALL different methods for the madness of sleep training. And I laughed at the end of it, that each answer was SO beautiful and so perfectly enlightened me on how they were going to approach this mothering gig. And again, my mother's voice rang SO loud during my own early season of finding motherhood - and she gave me the richest advice - Trust your mother heart - she said it to me over and over, even in situations where I knew I had a problem she could solve, she just looked at me so compassionately and reassuringly that I could do it, I could trust my own guts for my girl.

Finally in this last season, my own sister and I got to find motherhood together. Oh my how we weave our way so differently. And how much she shows me with her endless ability to give of herself. She delights and gives so gracefully. And I watch picking up any of the pieces my tightly knit mind can contain. I often then think of my twin cousins who also taught me a great deal about motherhood through their own actions even more than words as they preceded me in this grand adventure by a decade, I watched their differing approaches too. Both wonderful. And they kindly shared their words with me once it was my turn to give it whirl. In these last few years in Seattle, I have watched a beautiful mother of such depth of love, such knowingness of this season in her life and such intention to live into it. I am inspired and I mimic whatever I can.

All this to say, when I come to this day and try to accept any words from my family of the kind of mother I am, I realize, I am 100 mothers. I am a blend of all those before me and beside me that have so generously shared of their secrets or so gracefully led by example. I have seen you, the flashbacks in my head guide me, and I celebrate today so wholeheartedly for all the beautiful mothers I know. What a privilege it is to have that title. Never, never do I grow tired hearing that call from my girl's voice, "Mom!"