The sun is now being pushed aside by the greedy gray clouds that prefer their normal reign in this Seattle sky. And suddenly instead of wanting to rush outside and soak up every bit of vitamin D, i actually want to curl up on the sofa with tea or take a book to a long bubbly bath. Neither of which I will do, but I am stealing away time to think for today.

The last few days have been covered in conversation of home. What is home? How many can you have? Is there such a thing as a right geographical place for your family? Do most people have multiple places they see as home? When is wandering dangerous, and when is it helpful? Why do we move, why do we stay? How do you really know how much transition a young person can bear well?

I realize now that a for many years Stephen and I's conversations were more connected to the question - what are we supposed to be doing in this world? And by no means is that solved. This season, I feel this movement in us that the question is really about where are we to be where we can live most alive? Is there a right place? You see I have already filled the page with questions and that is exactly the deal, I have so many questions. Do any of you have this wander? Or are we especially nomadic?

Last night Stephen and I sat across from each other sharing and pondering together. While I still did not behave so well and Iet my defenses and fear began to take flight in the room, there were a couple of really sweet moments where I realized for the first time in many years, both of us are actually asking similar questions. Neither of us is in a get me outta here situation with a career or location. As we have crisscrossed the United States, we have wrestled so mightily with the Ashley love of East Coast and Stephen love of West Coast and lately, i think we realize we have love for both coasts and all that they hold. wow. We see now our hearts have more than one home.

To even have any choice to wander and to explore both coasts is a real privilege, one that has changed our lives. So we do not take lightly the freedom we have to even get to wander. But today I am asking myself - can my heart truly take on the stretch it feels so many days of deeply loving and knowing a southern life and people of beauty and depth while also feeling content and empowered in the northwest to be just as I was made and to enjoy so much splendor and creativity. I love two coasts. I never thought I'd say that.